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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24494908">A (Possibly) Short Collection of JadeNep Content</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Homestuck</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fluff, Marriage, redrom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:07:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,908</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24494908</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It's scientifically proven that JadeNep is good for the soul, so here's a collection of randomly assorted JadeNep content.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jade Harley/Nepeta Leijon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A (Possibly) Short Collection of JadeNep Content</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>==&gt; </b>
</p><p>
  <span>Your name is NEPETA LEIJON and you are kind of FREAKING THE FUCK OUT internally right now. Actually, scratch that, externally too. You’re about to get married to your girlfriend of two years and are only just now realizing that you have no idea how weddings work. It’s such an unfamiliar concept to you, yet here you are, wearing some suit your friend Kanaya made for you and staring yourself down in the mirror.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The last ten minutes of your time have been spent trying to get your hair to look nice and tidy. It’s a lost cause, but that doesn’t stop Kanaya from attempting to help you out with it anyway. </span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Your Hair Is Particularly Uncooperative</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Quick Question Have You Ever Even Brushed It</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; hmmmm</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; only a few times i think</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: A Few Times</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Throughout Your Entire Life</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; yes!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighs and places her brush back on the table. It’s a show of defeat in the most dignified manner possible.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And When Was The Last Time You Tried</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; hmmmm i think it was half a sw33p ago?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Half A Sweep</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Ok I Believe This Is A Lost Cause</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: You Look Fine Anyway</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; really??</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Yes</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; but my hair is still all messy</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; isnt it supposed to be neat fur weddings?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Well Yes But</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; i have an idea!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In one swift motion you lift up your hand, lick the back of it, and start using it to do some semblance of tidying up your hair. Before you can make much progress Kanaya politely yet firmly places a hand upon your arm and stops you from continuing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: No Dont Do That</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: It Is Going To Make It Worse</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; what do you mean?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; its just grooming</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: You Are Getting Saliva In Your Hair</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Pardon Me Saying This But That Is A Little Nasty</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; pounce did it all the time</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; and she taught me to do it!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Just</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Lets Leave Your Hair How It Is</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; but i want to be sure that it is absolutely purrfect!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Well</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Seeing As How Your Soon To Be Wife Is Also A Very Messy Haired Individual</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Am Sure She Wouldnt Mind It</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; you think so?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Yes I Do</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; okay</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; i trust your judgement</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Thank You</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Now</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She takes out her phone and takes a glance at the time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Its Time To Go</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Are You Ready</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; i really hope so</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <b>&gt;Nepeta: Be your soon-to-be wife</b>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>You cease being Nepeta and begin being yourself, aka her soon-to-be wife, aka Jade Harley. You’re making some last minute preparations before you walk down the aisle and… kiss her? You think that’s how weddings work? Rose has been trying to explain everything for the better part of half an hour at this point, but there’s a lot and you’re stuck worrying about messing it up and saying something stupid. You know for a fact that once you leave this room you’ll be winging it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even if you’re winging it, you’ll be damned if you don’t look good while doing it. And of course, what else to use for this occasion other than your old 3am dress? A small bit of spacey power-fueled rescaling later and it fits you perfectly, though it doesn’t really look like the dresses you see in weddings in movies. Not that you care, it’s your wedding and you are going to dress how you want!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: it looks good, right?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: My opinion has not changed since you asked me a few minutes ago.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: So yes, it looks good.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: sweet!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: sorry for asking so much</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: im just nervous :(</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Are you actually worried about your appearance?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: not really…</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Then what is it that you are so anxious about?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Not impressing her?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Saying something completely and utterly stupid?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She just hit the nail right on the doggy-eared head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: ok wow</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: that is…</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: exactly what i am worried about!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Of course.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: I was in your exact situation when Kanaya and I got married.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: It’s not pleasant.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: no its not!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: especially because i suck really bad at all the romantic stuff</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Hm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: hm?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Hm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: hm!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: I’m assuming you’d like some help figuring out what to say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: that would be really really appreciated!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: all i can come up with is just telling her how cute she is and how much i love her</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: That works.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: but thats like</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: two sentences at max</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Short and simple, is it not?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: its too short and too simple</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: remember how long and sweet and complicated you and kanaya were when you got married?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Yes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: But you and Nepeta are different people, are you not?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Please do correct me if I’m wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: oh jeez i dunno rose</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: going to need to think really long and hard about this one! :p</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Take your time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: You’re only due out there in ten minutes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: ten minutes?!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: oh god</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: rose i need to come up with something!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Don’t panic.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: I’ll assist you.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: thank you so much!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: No problem.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Now, let’s begin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: What is it that you’d like to communicate to her?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: that she is very adorable and sweet and i love her a lot</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: That’s a start.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Let’s stretch that out a bit. What do you find so adorable about her, specifically?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: her smile</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: every time she smiles it makes me so happy and i just-</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: woof woof!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: oops</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Are the woofs a part of it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: :p</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: We can work with this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Perhaps mention that so much as thinking about her smile makes it difficult to suppress your canine vocalizations.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: that works!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: and that she is the sweetest girl i have ever met</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: we have a lot in common too!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Good, good.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: How about this:</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="rose">ROSE: Nepeta, </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What follows is a flurry of only half-comprehensible words meant to express your love for Nepeta in a sophisticated and sufficiently lengthy manner. You have your doubts as to if you actually like the script or not, but you don’t really have an option anymore. You’ve gotta go and get married!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <b>&gt;Walk the aisle</b>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Despite neither of them having the slightest idea of what the fuck they are doing, Nepeta and Jade meet at the end of the aisle and prepare for their walk down it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: :o!!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: you look great!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; awww, thanks!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; but you look better :33</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: no way!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; yes way!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: no</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; yes</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: shush, cut-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, they become acutely aware of the crowd watching and listening to their little debate. Jade’s tail droops down and Nepeta’s cheeks are flushed with olive. Wordlessly, they lock their hands into a warm embrace and begin the walk down the aisle. Nepeta wraps her tail around Jade’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Time seems to slow more and more with every step taken. Jade becomes aware of how odd it feels to be holding Nepeta’s bare hand, lacking in any gloves. Nepeta finds herself scanning the crowd for Equius, seeking the sight of her moirail now more than ever if only for some sense of comfort and understanding that she’ll do just fine. Traditional wedding music blares from the speakers Dave set up, surprisingly free of any immense distortion or bass boosting. A calm wind blows on the backs of the couple, as if mother nature herself was urging the two forwards.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The final steps up to the stage are taken. A Prospitian carapacian pulls out a book presumably filled with meaningless mumbo jumbo and reads off the typical Earth C wedding jargon. Jade and Nepeta are barely listening, instead finding themselves mutually lost in each other’s gaze. Before they know it, they’re instructed to exchange their vows. They both look like deer caught in a pair of headlights.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <b>&gt;Nepeta: Exchange vows</b>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which one of you is supposed to go first?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; who-</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: do you want to-</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; ill go first!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>You take a deep breath, give a light tug at your collar and let the air out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; oh gosh</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; jade you are the purrttiest girl i have ever met</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; and you are the best matesprit any troll could ask fur!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: :33 &lt; nobody has ever b33n so similar to me and understanding as you are</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="nepeta">NEPETA: X33 &lt; even if i still dont really understand this whole marriage thing i am so happy to be doing it with you!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It feels like a weight is lifted off your shoulders as you let off that pure, concentrated blast of adorable love to your favorite doggy. She smiles and her tail begins wagging, you think you did it right!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <b>&gt;Jade: Exchange vows</b>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>You prepare yourself to recite the vows that Rose helped you come up with. She’s looking at you from her seated position within the crowd, an indescribable expression upon her face seemingly urging you onwards. You open your mouth to begin reading off your mentally-logged script.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: uhh-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>You choke up on your words. Your ears fall back and your tail stops dead in its tracks. Suddenly, you're second guessing the need for a script. You love her enough, why would you need someone else to compose your words to tell her that? Sure, Rose’s help is something you really do appreciate and the script she helped you come up with was beautiful, but it’s not you, it’s Rose. You decide that the best decision is to take the plunge and wing it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: nep, not only are you so adorable that i have a hard time stopping myself from woofing whenever i look at your smile</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: but the more important thing is that you are such a great person!</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: every time i feel sad or have trouble sleeping you know just what to tell me to make me happy again</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="jade">JADE: and we have so much in common that everyone can tell that we were meant for each other</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All of that slipped out from a single breath. You’re surprised that you even managed to come up with all that off the top of your head. It makes her blush, so you know you did something right! Out of the corner of your eye you notice Rose giving off a surprised yet impressed expression.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <b>==&gt; </b>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The carapacian goes on with more of the typical marriage wording, but neither Nepeta nor Jade could really be bothered to listen to any of it that intently. They’re completely fixated on each other, waiting for the moment that they can kiss. Everything around them feels as if it dissolves away into nothing, every care in the world whisked away to somewhere that isn’t here and now. Their hands interlocked, their eyes staring straight at each other, they wouldn’t rather be anywhere else. All they desire is to hear those special words. And soon enough, they come.</span>
</p><p><span>You may now kiss the bride.</span><br/>
</p><p>
  <span></span><br/>
</p>
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